My mom always complains about her life (My family is lower middle class but my parents live very very frugally to be able to support me financially) -My mom rescued a bunny that her friend was going to throw out. My mother is obese and has been for my whole life. My dad's siding with her. However, the things narcissistic mothers say will tell you everything you need to know about their motives. No matter how much i do for her, she spits in my face and, calls me useless. My mother suddenly starts saying hurtful things to me, I try to tell her to stop because she is hurting my feelings, and then she starts yelling at me that her feelings matter too and that she has had a terrible childhood and that I am offended by everything and that I am punishing her and that she will never speak to me again. Everything is hard work for her. It doesn't matter what it is or who or where she always has something negative to say. She never complains, She always loves us no matter what we do. Her parents practically did everything for her, including raising us kids. She couldn't say this things to my mom herself, so she took it out on me. My helper's cooking is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better than my mom's. She always comains but never does something about it and just ignores the problem by hanging out with her friends. No matter how much I have done and I have done a lot! (Not that i was the perfect daughter, not saying that) It hasn't fixed her. She is very narcissistic and believes everything is about her. In particular, she’s committed to helping Looking for some advice. I mean they’ve always complained about each other but my dad is telling me stuff that is just downright F’d up (like complaining that they haven’t been intimate in XX number of years). It’s become overbearing. I never knew I was complaining, I just thought we were talking. I come from a culture where my family needs to sign off on the person I marry. Yeah my grandma does this. Good So, my opinion is: you own nothing to your mother, you’ve done more than enough already, just go live your life and go low to no contact with her. "Oh girls shouldn't do this, shouldn't say this, shouldn't laugh like this" on the other hand "oh boys will be boys" "oh you know how boys are" My mom also spoils my little brother (who's only 1. I know my actions are my fault though. I (19F) live at home with my mom and other family members. I know my mom was always lacking things in her life. His siblings cuss him out and when he Her yelling stems from anger issues that have developed as a result of her growing up in a dysfunctional family, and I have tried to be understanding of that and remain calm and/or leave the room when she gets upset with me and/or my dad (I rarely argue with my dad or with anyone outside my immediate family, but my mom argues with and/or yells Your mom is likely toxic if she continually plays the role of a victim. I think if you read about personality disorders you will see your Mom. And the number of abandoned half finished lego sets, game pieces and toys around my house because they were bored after a bit. But because she was kicked out at 16 by She’s manipulative. Pingback: My Mom Wants To Get Rid Of My Cat ( Problem Solved) Pingback: I Want A Tattoo But My Parents Would Kill Me (12 Solutions) - Comments are closed. I have been in this situation for basically my whole life. My dad and her never had money and when she left us for another man suddenly we had money. My mom is the most negative person I know. I just tune her out now My father always complains when he has to spend money on me . She barely ever buys me the things i need, and when she does, even if it is 50 cents she is spending on the material i need for school she will always complain about it and remind me constantly about it, she spends around 60 dollars on cigaretes but she will complain if i ask her to buy me clothes when i need them, also i was sick last week and i missed school for two days My mom is a complainer. Unfortunately however, they both passed and we have no other family close to us. She complains about work- get up and leave. My mom did this Growing up, I remember most of our conversation was about her talking shit about my dad, or other people, or complaining. Then she bankrupted husband #2 and then stole from all three of her kids until we all cut her off. But the real problem is when my wife complains something about my mom said. Now let me preface this by saying, I don’t have some wild vice against There are a lot of might-be-wrongs here, including: the venting to Mom; Mom's accepting her daughter's version wholesale; and the goings-on between you and your wife that generate such venting. She further stated that her primary focus is on building her career and that marriage is not currently a priority for her. I feel obligated to keep her in my life but I don't feel any love or even interest towards her. She has taken some accountability and improved a lot but some of her ways are still the same. She gets her way in some mighty large decisions even against your reservations. She was always upset with me and would also give me the silent treatment so that I was ostracized if I ever disagreed or “disobeyed” her. It took her a few years after leaving him to really heal. But the thing is I have everything I need wich I'm very thankful for, so the logical thing to do at my age is to spend it on hobbies or something I like that's what I usually do. When birthdays, Mother's Day, Christmas or whatever rolls around, my mom always complains that I never do anything or get anything for her and my dad does as well. For a few months we chased around, trying to find out what was wrong, wasting a lot of time and running up the Medicare bill Idk but my parents are so scared of me hanging out with male friends that they’re THIS controlling. Mine were always saying they're bored and I can admit we didn't really restrict screen time so they had ipads, tv, etc. I regret so much. I had been expecting an announcement of their divorce since I was a fairly young teenager. So mom sees me as super lazy. Shes been stuck in this 'woe is me, I'm a victim of life' mode for years. Try harder. And when it comes to me being upset about something it's overreacting or too much or I'm being ridiculous. You've been complaining about the same nonsense for nearly ten years. Shes always making me get off my computer during long sessions, which is Very old post I know, but my mom does the SAME THING, she’s always cooking- While me and my older sister keep telling her it’s fine, we can order food, we can cook for ourselves, there are LEFTOVERS cause she always cooks more than she has to, but my mom will still cook. I agree with taking her out - but expect her to still complain. Kim Kardashian cater yo other people when the pastors of the church wouldn’t ever think of doing half of that for us. I just wish I could give my mom the life she deserves but I just cant right now. Growing up she was always the second choice, people would tell her If your wife always complains, don't make the mistake of just ignoring her. All for a woman who resented having kids with zero hint of gratitude. It's hard to please her because she has a complaint about it being nasty even if I get her something new. She does it so often that I’m just tired and want to see what other people think. He would take out presents away when my mom wasn’t looking and tell us we’re too spoiled. But that has only made it worse. Anyway my mom called her brother a few times after his My mom had dementia and would constantly tell us she wanted to go to the ER. The best example I can give is that I was devastated about not getting a job I've really wanted and worked hard to prep for interviews. In this article, we’ll explore some possible reasons why your mom may be complaining so much, One of the most effective strategies in dealing with a constantly complaining mother is practicing active listening. We found a caregiver (all kids live out of state). She complains because her long-term care insurance hasn’t reimbursed her yet. The problem is that my mother has a bit of a shopping addiction and, several times a week, goes to the mall or shopping plaza and buys hordes of random stuff for both herself and, often, me — sweaters, pyjamas, shirts, keychains, phone cases, and even underwear. I don’t have it in me. The doctors could never find anything wrong. I am a 26-year-old woman who has a close relationship with both of her parents. Your Mom is an adult and has made her choices. So I am a 22 yo male. When my mom was with her now-ex, she was a different person. If you don't take care of them, you may lose your wife altogether. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even ask her how her day at work was because honestly, I don’t want to her her complain about how she hates it. She has binge eating problems. She also didn't get along with my mom who she hasn't spoken to in over ten years and will just tell you the same complaints over and over. recently I was visiting my mom and her cell phone rang. I feel so bad she is going through so much, but I hate how it makes me feel. Needless to say, as an aging adult now, I am hesitant to speak about my own physical Its just hard to love her when she always complains about having to be a mother. Kim A part of me wants to do as you say because I know how emotionally abusive her culture has been and still is. What also grinds my gears is when she expects me to be her chat buddy. It doubly makes me happy bc my wife is not close with her own mom- so to see her find that bond with an older woman, and be able to share certain things with her, and lean on her, it has filled my heart with so much love. "hey mom, you're cooking is bad" And she was like " you wanna eat you eat, otherwise not my problem" she was least bothered Especially my mom who hasn't been employed her whole life almost. Her complaining ranges from real issues like money, however she wastes a lot of money. I am her only friend and it is disturbing. " Mom always behaved better for non family members. She would complain about her head hurting. Honestly listen to her, cause ull regret it later. But, nope. As the complaining continued, you probably felt My mom has a lot of health issues, depression being one of them, but it's getting almost unbearable, at times. get a toxic, abusive person out of my life. So sorry! Sounds like your mom is used to getting attention by being negative and that’s a hard cycle to break. It sounds like your mom is working the 1 job, assuming she's not pulling 80 hour work weeks, there's no reason why she shouldn't be doing some of this herself. 7 and had to spend 40 minutes in the shower cause my body decided it was done with life. Now she complains about multiple people in her home every day (OT, PT. Oh, i feel ya, my mom is veg but i am not, meat is somewhat allowed in my house + we have a helper. Even before when my aunt and her family would visit us, I have never seen Okay so my mom constantly complains about me and basically my generation and comparing to hers. My 600-lb Life; Last Week Tonight with John Every Christmas we would open our presents, then my narc stepdad would get drunk and scream at us about how we didn’t deserve anything we got. When the slightest minor inconvenience happens, she's complaining about it, but never takes any sort of action to change it. 5 yr younger btw), when he runs out of money she For the last little while, say 4-5 months (but it feels so much longer than that), all our conversations have been dominated by her just complaining to me about her life and stuff. It’s always been this way. He married a very wealthy woman 45 years ago (she was worth 100 million). ” Just calmly reply with. It sucks, but it's her life and she has her own coping strategy. My mom has recently had her life change with my dad’s decline. I've been pretty quiet about it, as I'm generally the quieter between myself and my twin, but it makes me want to They are very toxic like for instance his mom always complains about cooking 2 separate dinners so we would cook for everyone,last week she and my bf argued so on Sunday she cook for her and the 3 kids so I began to cook for me n my bf she then expect me to cook for everyone I choose not to she got upset. SHES 7 ffs. There are a lot of might-be-wrongs here, including: the venting to Mom; Mom's accepting her daughter's version wholesale; and the goings-on between you and your wife that generate such venting. She is a narcissist and was abusive to me. They clean the house, cook, etc. I had a really hard time bonding with my daughter when she was born, I was still struggling with depression from after my son, but I obviously have always loved her but I'm struggling with bonding with her still. My uncle (who’s living with us too) and my mom kept on telling her to stop cooking for everyone lol. I can't stand her at all. She's always to be in control some kind of way even if she's uninvolved. I have very mixed feelings about her. She always needs to vent about how inconsiderate me, my brother, his wife, and my dad are to her and everything she has done for us. Late to the party. If you don't want her to complain, stop letting it control you. She would always tell me her work and family My mother is starting to show signs of early dementia, and very stubborn. She might have the attitude of the world is always out to get her. In the past, I've always been one to lend an ear to her issues, and help her with problems in her life. I cut her out of my life 5½ years ago & haven't looked back. FYI the friend I was hanging out with that day was a GIRL and because my mom says she doesn’t know who she is, she treats my friends that she doesn’t know like a criminal. I have always been in the position you are in. Post about anything related to family! This can be questions, stories, and comparisons on families. What is really disturbing me lately is my DAD is complaining about my mom to me, and in inappropriate ways. She literally comes home from her 4 hour day and watches TV and then goes for a jog. She liked our achievements only to show off, not to share actual joy with us. Complaints are a warning sign. If your mom is a narc or always out of control with her emotions you will probably be better with the more “deflect and dip” and avoidance She's Always Been This Way. I seriously cant wait to move Mom has no friends and never has, is very selfish, it is always 100% about her. Think of your Nmom like a 2 yr old who does not get her way. Another edit- one of the first aspects of my life I stopped sharing was my friends. I wear the clothes I wear because I feel comfortable in it and it makes me feel nice. She will tell me I never listen and how I needed to do it her way. She complains if I don't get something of hers from the store . Same-ish situation as OP—24, living at home. Even then I thought it was strange that she never taught me how to If your mom always complains about what you get her for gifts, because they're not expensive enough, she's definitely an AH. Career was shattered. what spoke levels to me was when he told me that he’s trying to do For context, I (25F) live with my Mom, Dad, and older sister. In this article, we’ll explore some possible reasons why your mom may be complaining so much, Last week my body decided freezing the infection was the way to go and I went from 102 down to 95. It does get tiring. It sucked for me, but in our case, we didn't have another option. In the case of parents, specifically moms, experts say issues like these are due to See more Change the Topic. Which of course triggered her so badly, at one point she handed me a stack of papers with symptoms for each of her claimed ailments and insisted I read and initial each page to acknowledge her diagnoses. Due to various family circumstances that I don't want to get into, my mom and her brother have not gotten along, in part because of how he mistreated my grandparents. At first she was like : ok bunny stays in cage and eats leftover vegetables. God yes. Even just like “I feel like we never talk about my life But the real problem is when my wife complains something about my mom said. When i was a kid, i was at a healthy weight but my parents always told me how fat i was but my mom fed me so so much food. She’s always been this way. So I was wondering if anyone goes through the same thing Yea maybe. She should feel lucky that she has a child that is willing to take care of her at her old age. Never even tries to meet me half way. According to Pinsly, toxic moms love to gaslight by However, with my mom's health condition and my dad's recently found job that we are just able to live by. Active listening goes beyond just hearing what your mother is saying—it involves showing genuine interest and Try and understand who your mom is by asking her how she grew up, and ask her about her life and her struggles as a woman. Nothing is enough for her and it's always the other person's fault. My mom cleans the house a lot and she moves MY stuff around and organizes MY stuff HER way. My mother was a very attractive woman when she was younger. He's always been a complainer, but it feels like unless everything is to his liking and catered exactly to his tastes, everyone else has to be miserable. However, she turned it into her life story about how 30 years ago, she became a SAHM and her in-laws gave her an earful. I had to do that as a kid, much younger than you even, because my mom left her abusive husband and worked 3 jobs. She also in the past maybe 3 years has made it difficult to take her out to rest because of being rude and cranky to She keeps complaining and lying. She has no idea who I am. I don't want my family to split up and I don't want my dad to be hurt. All my life my mom has been critical to me and my brother. But its her complains that makes everyone facepalm. She does it in front of my boyfriend and my son. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. She is always stressed about the work she does around the house because my dad doesn't help. When you discuss your life issues with your mother, does she divert the discussion to talk about herself? When you discuss your feelings with your mother, does she try to top the feeling with her own? For context, I (25F) live with my Mom, Dad, and older sister. When u get that D ull regret not studying. 'This is my life and I may love my mom, but I cannot let her Your Dad is making it this way for everyone. Graduate complains online as mom pressures to marry. Last year, my mom encouraged us to buy a condo together, and she helped A LOT with the downpayment. I'm worried because now we have a daughter on the way and she wants her mom to stay with us to help her out. Everyday when we come home, she will get into comfortable clothes, and then fall asleep in the living room chair. Yes, but without me she yes !!! my husband called it to my attention that sometimes i complain about things that don’t really matter and can be dealt with if i were just a little bit more adaptable. Not much has changed but she will go to her mom's more without me which is nice. Kim Kardashian; Doja Cat; My wife complains that my mom is very maternal and affectionate with my sister but shows little interest in our son. And she text that how much she hated my mom and will always hate her if she still like that. The doctors can rarely find anything, so it mostly hypochondria. My aunt comes to visit her mom sometimes, treats our house like a guest house, and doesn’t help around in any way whatsoever. what spoke levels to me was when he told me that he’s trying to do When I got her that before she wanted something new then. ” I know they are seniors now, but it’s like they enjoy acting this way/act this way on purpose? My sister has had issues with her weight throughout her entire life. She's always complaining about something. I know shes tired but saying "one day i will die and you'll have nothing" to my little siblings wont do shit. 3 thoughts on “My Mom Wants To Kick Me Out (9 Essential Things You Can Do)” Pingback: 8 Reasons Why Your Mom Always Complains. I gave up a full time job five years ago to take them food shopping, to the doctor, dentist, and shopping and lunch on Tues and Thurs of every week. I try hard to get along with my mom and I used to do everything for her she still complains. In the past, I got my mom an Edible Arrangement fruit basket for her birthday and she yelled at me for wasting money. #3 “My Mom Makes Everything About Her” It was always about her- that’s the familiar phrase children of narcissists say when they reflect on their childhood. My mother is always sick. And it's usually negative. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: My job as a husband is to support my wife, so I feel like maybe I was the a-hole for complaining about her complainingbut I also think what I said wasn't really bad This is what I call “the core conflict” in my book, Daughter Detox: the conflict between the daughter’s growing recognition of how she’s been wounded by her mother and her hunger for her That is, on top of all the complaining about her not having the money to afford necessities, complaining about her weight, complaining about her lack of friends. My mom has always leaned on me. My mom does this, my dad does it sometimes. It's always the same things, over and over again. I used to be just like OP’s friend because that’s how my Mom and her friends would communicate. and my son doesn't want to get close to my mom because he knows how bad my mom is treating her My mom wont shut the hell up about my "video game addiction" (Which I dont even have) Basically I play around 6 hours a day when I have IRL school, and like 9-10 with virtual school (I play during school but I get most of my work done) Also like 9-10 hours on weekends. When she cleans the living room and I have to go to the bathroom, she complains about how I keep getting the house dirty and that I should stop moving around. She begins lamenting about her terrible boss if you’re struggling at work. We also have a weird dynamic that my mom doesnt want to be around my dad (divorced). Unfortunately I've got a few key whiners in my life to have learned this little tip. Thank God I live far from her. It is better when you distance yourself from her. Sometimes she would call 911 and we didn't know it. She complains about how we never clean up after ourselves when that's ALL WE DO. I have always I relate to this so much. I love her but I feel this anger inside me and I can't even express myself to anyone. (22M) -broke so i can't move out, can't find a job because of some situations- She (57) is the most horrible person i know, she only yells and complains all the f*cking time there isn't one single good thing that she could talk to me about, i don't want to be around her, i don't eat because of that, i don't do shit because of that, all she says is "my back hurt" "i work all the time" (is not Next time she tries comparing you, Tell her you’ll remember that next time. Thanks to my mom, I became a very hypervigilant person who easily picks up mood changes in everyone and is always on the lookout. yes !!! my husband called it to my attention that sometimes i complain about things that don’t really matter and can be dealt with if i were just a little bit more adaptable. She complains about work, her coworkers, and the students. Expect her to complain about everything and try not to personalize it. But it's gotten to the point where they're so unrelatable. I think it made her depend on me more. Her behavior has ruined both my childhood and adult life. You may wonder why your mom seems to always find something wrong with what you’re doing, no matter how hard you try. Never use this subreddit as your first and final source of OP this was my parents until 2 years ago, even on the morning of my wedding my mum was complaining about how bad married life was. Now im at a healthy weight again but my mom keeps complaining about how i eat too less, how im unhealthy, but she's the obese one. I love my mom very much, but she always complains about stuff that went down at work. But mom always expects more. Today, my mom and I argued about why she was always pushing me to find a job that was related to what I was studying in college, but I wanted to find a part-time job and enjoy my summer. Stop letting her complaining change what you guys do. " "Yes but you don't understand. She would always tell me her work and family 13K likes, 2,944 comments - humblethreads9 on June 13, 2024: "She has always been there. She didn't love my father and I think she needed me more than she loved me. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. my mom always complains that her whole childhood and adulthood was spent in the church and she doesn’t have a life because of it but that’s the exact same Hope I helped someone. She can be really nice, and seem engaged and interested if you don’t know her. God thank you for my Mom Grant her long life and Good health. So I was wondering if anyone goes through the same thing I do this with my mom. I have a very dear friend who has spent ten years with someone that isn't right for her. The young lady, who will turn 23 in February, shared that despite her efforts to ease the pressure by introducing her mom to the man she is currently dating, the incessant marriage talks have not stopped. I complained about her ALL the time, to ANYONE. My parents have been divorced for something like 20 years but my mom still carries much hate for my dad (my mom cheated on my dad). This left me to deal with my mom and the responsibility of my siblings. She throws a tantrum and tries to get you to focus on her needs always. My dad is also very cheap and wouldn't want to pay for it even if he could. I am looking to go for my masters and am in a The checks are not enough for her to survive on her own which is why I'm trying my hardest to help her out. Recently, we've been purchasing a new house; we've always rented, so this is her first time actually living in her own house. But I watched and learned. After the 3rd time of her calling 911 she almost got me arrested for 911 abuse I had to put her in a nursing home. My mom was always so mean to my brothers wives that it tore our families apart. Before you say maybe she does too much at home, she only does grocery shopping everything else is taken care of by my sister and my dad. and she also complains about how lazy my dad was and there was a time he lost his job and stayed without job for a while and how he yelled at her when she asked him to find a job and that the reason we face problems with money sometimes is him. She will say I've spent hours giving her 'boosts' where I've told her to think positively, I've told her all her good attributes and praised her, and she'll sit there quietly and agree religiously. They're the worst always complaining about wait a minute we're complaining about complaining. I have been the sole provider for most of this, with her staying home. And she rarely takes responsibility for the way her actions contribute to her reality. My mom said she's scared of me (I've never ever been rude to her in the slightest) and that she doesn't want to hear anything and it's all my fault. Bather, caregiver, home health nurse). You have to do what is healthy and safe for you above all else. or eating dinner - she always brings up something work-related. She would always complain about the gifts I got her (often asked if I could return it, or compairing to other Well believe me we are all suffering it is a 24/7 job Always stressed and exhausted But as for me I cannot even imagine myself doing other job even though I am under paid and on the edge of being insane 😂 On the other hand it is not that bad to complain all the time for me it is my decision and I love the challenge. This is just the way kids are sometimes. My Mom, sister and I are teachers. He knows my every darn secret, he basically knows everything about me because my mom always complains to him about me. I don't like this feeling cause it shouldn't be this way. Playing the This happens every single freaking time. Mostly, because she isn’t forced to stay. but my mon has done this all of my life. My mom has been mentally ill my whole life with severe bipolar disorder, major deppresive disorder, OCD, and agoraphobia. I am in my forties. And she gets jealous over little things. It was always,"My way or the highway!" situation. Then I got fat, of course i got fat shamed a lot, like 24/7. I essentially gave up my own life – I left my children (teens & 20’s) to fend for themselves and took a leave of absence from my job. Like she doesn't even go out at all. OP this was my parents until 2 years ago, even on the morning of my wedding my mum was complaining about how bad married life was. Me(16/f) and my mom, always fight about how I spend my money she always complains that I only spend it on games or useless things. She calls every couple of months and complains about her situation. It's me dealing with her temper and her problems. Her misery almost cost me my life partner. What the title says. She is a real hypocrite and I hate her for that so much. . I'm a young adult, but I always feel so Irritable around her now because she always complains about her marital and financial problems and then complains about everyone in public on top of that. 🤷🏽 Her fields of interest include Asian languages and literature, Japanese translation, cooking, natural sciences, sex positivity, and mental health. ) Thats literally how my mom acts. I'm really about to go crazy. But, for a period of about 2 1/2 years, I was the stay at home spouse. Then, one moment An unloved daughter’s core conflict is her recognition of how she’s been wounded by her mother and her hunger for her mother’s approval and love. Everyday, she complains about I have a friend who always complains about her job, her living situation, and her life in general whenever we talk. I (15) have been struggling to keep my cool around my dad when he complains. We would have all been better off had we dropped it into the hospital social worker's lap, and said, "She's yours. She wants to eat out ALL THE TIME on my dime. There has also been some self-inflicted things from scratching and using skin preparations wrong. I do all the errands/grocery shopping. I'm getting annoyed. She is also very narcissistic in nature, and has been difficult to deal with all of my life. She doesn't drive anywhere because she complains she is sick/low energy. By now you've probably heard that toxic people in your life can stress you out, and hold you back. My mom always complains about “how old they are” and how my dad is “becoming an old man. My mom wouldn’t stand up for us so he kept getting away with it till I moved. 1 “I never said that!” If your mom predictably yells “I never said that!” whenever you bring up one of her hurtful comments, You may wonder why your mom seems to always find something wrong with what you’re doing, no matter how hard you try. Remember, a personality disorder is an ongoing, life-altering problem, so there's no need to worry if your mom has been moody off and on, or if you only occasionally argue. About work, her drive, her weekend at the cottage she just had the good fortune of buying??? FUCK! But I realized I was always complaining about her complaining to my husband and quickly stopped. ️ #mother #mom #faith #christian #love #god". I feel like my mom is setting herself up for depression because every human being NEEDS to do something they love and find meaninful in life to be fulfilled. If you steer the conversation in a direction they find My mom hasn't worked a normal steady job for the past 10 years because she is too tired/doesn't want to work anymore she's turning 56 this year. She complained about being his caregiver. But I dont think this should matter. My mother complains constantly that things are getting to be So I am a 22 yo male. ” In fact, even the kindest, most considerate people complain—the average person does it between 15 and 30 times a day. If only most of us could have that luxury. When I remarked at how negative she is, my dad said to leave her alone, that it is her hobby. I have. I just wish my mom viewed life differently, there is more to life than what she spends most of her time doing (complaining and cleaning. In her case, it is every day. Like she looked so angry, I knew that if I started asking her what was wrong, she was gonna yell at me. my mom also is the one who always complains but I can't figure out my dad situation . And while im trying to stay above hypothermia (which kicks in at 95 degrees) my kid was banging on the door asking what im making for dinner. I ignored my father in the last years of his life due to her pressuring. but after a time in my life where all the Ns around came out of the woods and attacked me at the same time (at work : 3, friends: 2, relatives : 4, ILs : 4), I buckled, and collapsed You're not doing anything wrong. Ffs. Empower yourself with strategies based on awareness!-By the end of this article, you will be able to see behind the Your questions about your momit likely is a result of what your dad has put her through. He inflicted a lot of mental, emotional, and financial abuse, he had affairs, he convinced her she'd be homeless if she left him. Go pursue that artistic life you’ve always wanted, do things that make you happy, and don’t let her take you down, which she’ll always try to do whenever you’re close to her. Set a boundary and say" No Nmom you are an adult and you needs to be responsible for your own emotions/ feelings". And complaining doesn’t always have a negative impact. She takes everything for granted. But the fact remains that I have been trying to tell her how I feel for my entire life, and she has always remained in amused denial. My life stopped between ages 25-40. Everything I did as a child was a reflection of who my mom wanted me to be. I've just almost had enough now. Sometimes these toxic people can be friends, or even parents. Like, I just want to go to the bathroom. She lives mostly alone because her parents travel for work but they try to be home like 3x a week, and when they are and want to rest and ask her to clean up or whatnot, she complains (it's not like she's asked to do everything, her mom still does her fair share). I listen to her vent all If you aren't ready to divorce, I think you need to push back. But old people lah, don’t want to listen as usual. Keeping contact with Mom outside of him and their house is probably the best Hello, I'm 16 years old and I'm struggling with my relationship with my mom. It's affected my work life, too - I'm always second guessing if I'm doing something the "right" way. My 600-lb Life; Last Week Tonight with John Oliver; Celebrity. If tired then rest no need cook. She’s basically unhappy and you can be there for her, but you can’t make growing old easier. But still got bored. For the first time in my life I'm fully comfortable with my body and wearing revealing clothes. Toxic maternal behavior can include things Here are 25 signs your mom is toxic, according to experts. I don't really have advice. For the longest, she's always hovered over my life and always watched what I did because I'm Calling my mom a chronic complainer is putting it lightly. It was the best time of my life. What medications should she take? The mod team does their best to remove bad information, but we do not catch all of it. My sister always complains about her to me too. RANT- Advice Wanted I have brought it up to my mom many times, but she brushes it off or says “no he’s your dad he loves you and don’t think of him like that” it’s hard to get through to her too. You are not her therapist so you are not responsible for her negative feelings. Because that will go on for an hour. I always hate having to listen to my mom's problems and having Everything be about her, she always likes to make it seem like it's about me all the time but in reality. So many of these events are awkward. 377K subscribers in the family community. It happens all the time. I love my mom, but I hate her as a person. My ah ma cooks okay also. I also have a job at the same place as my mom. I now live on my own and have a built a life for myself where I am genuinely happy. My mom is in her seventies. Then complain about that food saying it's nasty, tastes old, or complain I didn't go to the same place. As a child, she would get mad at us for even making a mess when we played with our toys. My mom complains to me EVERYDAY. The thing is, they're both smart people and when they work together to tackle something bigger than them, I'm always so proud they're my parents. And there are other, more serious things she has done that I don't particularly feel like sharing here. If you just closed in on a house, she starts telling you how frustrating buying her first home was. Because apparently my aunt always complains to my mom that she's scared of me and she never writes first, yet she always asks about me and how I'm doing. She always talks to my brother when they have a problem and I know she gone it still hurts. Try to bond with her on a different level and make time for deep conversations. This is just for a few more years, ull always have time to sleep or watch netflix, but ur exam score stays with u for the rest of ur life. She is . With the weight gain and age, I've come to the My parents are in their early 60s are in generally good health, but move and act like they are in their 80s. Sometimes she completely ignorant and doesn't even talk to people (be it me or the cashier at the store etc). She never liked any of my friends. As her children we were played one against the other, always believing that one of the others was her favorite. Yes, constantly. then, once she complains about the tiniest thing, I’m talking “oh shoot I need to get eggs at the store. Edit 2: Back to op's point, if the person has a real problem and isn't a constant complainer take op's advice. Many times over the years, when my sister would be feeling really insecure, my mom would tell me about how sick she was of hearing about her problems. Weird thing is, I never really felt there was something wrong with her and me because of her until I hit my mid 30s after getting married, and after getting real affection from my husband. If your mom predictably yells “I never said that!” whenever you bring up one of her hurtful comments, consider it a sign of toxicity. She also complains that her boss is too nice. Since she's a bit less proactive about life, she often gets My dad was never in my life either, my grandma has always spoiled me so maybe that's why I've gotten my kids more stuff than they need. She constantly complains about what she doesnt have and looks at everyone around her getting renovations, going on vacations, buying new stuff etc. Everyone told me to ditch her, and I always had a "Yes, but. My mom then rants about her only living brother. Whether you've always had a bad relationship with your mother, or it's a newer development, here are ways to deal with a toxic mom. For the last little while, say 4-5 months (but it feels so much longer than that), all our conversations have been dominated by her just complaining to me about her life and stuff. It even leads me to believe that something is never clean enough and we used every What the title says. If I bring up any suggestion or anything she will shut me down. When your wife first started complaining, you may have tried to do things to make her happy. same lmfaoo? my mom is always acting all My mom always complains that her bones hurt and she might have osteoporosis. You've tried. I’m 33 & she is still always telling me “oh I’m trying to lose weight like always, story of my life”. I can tell my mom was really angry with me (hence the My grandma calls her daughter every day and my mom says she hears them gossip about my mom’s day-to-day activities which really ticks her off. which I don't think is the case, and said unless there is a "valid" reason she is going to keep touching her My mom has always been I'm 20F (about to be 21 in 3 weeks). She expects everyone to take care of her. I'm also the eldest daughter. I think she might have an idea of how human relationships look, and mimics it. Meanwhile my mom owns her own house and has 3 children. Always visit a doctor in real life if you have any concerns about your health. She usually sets her alarm for 30 mins to 1 hour. I love her and finally said, "Look, there's nothing new here. A toxic mom is a professional manipulator. My dad is usually out of the house, but she complains to him everyday, even on phone calls. When my mom was alive when I had a problem she brushes it off quickly or she says you are always complaining. She died last year – I was her primary caregiver for the last 8 months of her life. How do I know? Ever since I was a kid my mom has always had a hard on for money. When I was younger she was like this about friends. Mom complains about anything and everything, always resentful and the victim, and always unloads when she gets home from work. She “refused” to allow me to marry the love of my life. I am his DAUGHTER. I want to stop feeling bothered by all of She probably like going to work so she can complain about her home life. You don't have to agree with it. She is mad at my dad over an incident that happened a few weeks ago and won't let it dropshe fusses about him, she fusses about me to me, she complains about all her health problems (she does have a lot), she complains about everything in her life, it ( Things narcissistic mothers say- READ/WATCH/LISTEN) The things narcissistic mothers say are as predictable as they are telling. “Ya know a better mom would have gotten eggs before we needed them. We all My mom always complains that I'm showing off my body and to some extent I never really understood that logic. By the time I was in high school, I just ignored her complaints. We have times where we've gone to a restaurant and had a great meal with great service and she will go out of her way to find at My mom always complains to me about her martial issues, her medical issues , etc. Mom treats me and my brother differently and always use gender as an excuse. Relationships moved on. They're of the boomer generation. She complains that her siblings (all of whom are already working or have their My wife and I have been together for about 15 years, with three kids. That woman is not happy unless she has something to complain about. (I won’t deny it) But I do my bare minimum of chores, I do anything that’s assigned to me. Thanks. My mom was trying to be empathetic (which is kind of her weakness). Mom has no friends and never has, is very selfish, it is always 100% about her. My mom always victimized herself although she destroyed everyone’s life around her. Like one time, my mom came home from a long day at work and she looked pissed. My wife complains about almost everything. Kim Let’s be real here. Its just very upsetting to me. So i told her straight up. My mom would always complain that I didn't help and when she was my age (a preschooler) she was cooking all the meals for her family and doing all the laundry and cleaning. We live on a small condo so it's going to be tight living quarters and I'm sure her mom will get on her nerves but oh well, guess this is my life now. Like your Mom, my Mom has never "been there" for me. I don't even know what to do anymore. and my son doesn't want to get close to my mom because he knows how bad my mom is treating her Other examples of her being negative are trivial things, like we get food from a new restaurant and before even trying it, she is like we should not have come here, the food will be terrible, and after the food arrived even if it is actually really tasty she will still complain. I'm afraid to tell this to someone. sounds just like my narcissist mother. soyy wqsrb xmxnr sxu ndrmrt wbuyd fjsw jio odhbide fihofmaj