Aita money reddit. r/AITAH •. NTA. whatever we wanted for ourselves we had to buy. AITA because I keep messaging my mom about money. I told my parents that my sister had to pay to fix my car after she stole it or I would report it stolen. AITA Family and money, step sibling drama. I'm 63 years old. AITA for not giving money despite not having a job? I 22yr male am currently living with my uncle and aunt with my mom and 2 of my 3 sisters. I 34F have recently ran into a situation with my husband 37M and am curious about if I am the AH here or not. This will in no way affect our budget for anything other than our own personal side projects and hobbies. The only reason I am bringing this up now is because I still get rude or passive aggressive comments about it. What really sickens me is how their mom sneakily tried to get her to talk to Dan. And there is a reason you uncle chose to give you this money, you are not required to bleed yourself dry for your cousins. Both my mom and my other sister have jobs while i stay at home taking care for my 2 year old sister. 2: I might be the asshole because it's causing him to be unable to budget properly, according to him. "I just don't have it. Nothing good will come out a relationship with them. My nieces were very disappointed that they won't get to go. Tina's mother passed away but her maternal grandparents live in My wife is a lawyer. Not in the US. You can light it on fire if you want. Not the A-hole. I got very creative with hiding it. Things took a turn when I fell into some bad habits and I took around 18k (not usd) from a friend of mine and 20k from a girl I was dating when we were together. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. AITA for accepting the prize money for winning a game I didn't know I was playing? Not the A-hole. If your parents think your sister needs help, they can use their own money. Your sister is a married woman with a husband and children. My parents have always favored my younger brother. When I (27F) was little my father gambled away all the saving about $100,000 in risky penny stocks which got wiped out in 2008 and we were forced to move into a single bedroom in a house for the 3 of us. So to start , I was always a good friend to people around me and always helped them any way I could. The PTA has been planning a fundraiser for months to raise money for new cheerleader uniforms. AITA for not helping my parents when they are homeless? Not the A-hole. She tried to insert herself into our family very quickly. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Get a new iPad. My issue is your wife's behavior. AITA for accepting money from my parents for my wedding then eloping. Also, why are you funding the party? If she can’t hve a party bc you pulled your money well that’s not your problem. They were only together for eight months AITA here? TL;DR fiancee can get similar dress for around $100 with shipping online but wants to blow over $1000 at a local wedding dress boutique aita for saying to get a cheaper one online? EDIT: Emma found this thread, it was a mistake to post here and im sorry i posted our problems on reddit, iata Keep your money. I might be the asshole because my parents are using money they had saved up to take us to Florida for a vacation to replace my car. He told me to count it and it came to £3200. She was surrounded by actual grown-ups though and acted like a 14 year old mean girl from a bad sitcom. She and her husband are required to support the family, not you. I told him, that the money was a precaution I would have taken with any partner and not specific to him. Even before the wedding planning started, the overall vibe was just weird. For big money sometimes there are two trustees that must both agree on any withdrawal or transfer. Never lend money to family that you aren't prepared to never get back. It’s your mom’s money, period; you have no idea what she might want or need to use it for herself in her years to come. I 35 female am engaged to my fiancé Brian 37 male. You have a right to keep the money you earned for university. I’m glad your dad supports you, don’t ever expect anything from your mum as she obviously favours your sister. not saying that doesnt happen but its important to recognize that for significant number of people thats literally impossible, no amount of saving will make you anything near wealthy when at the end of the month after necesseties you have like $50 and inflation in the past (edit) year was 8%. (As we lived together , even though we A place to satirize, crosspost from, poke fun at, and hold meta discussions on the never-ending ridiculous stories and creative writing exercises from AITA and AITA-adjacent subs, including classic tales of your local reddit heroes seeking validation. I took advantage of better times, financially speaking, and managed to get enough money to save, have a good retirement, and leave a good inheritance for my children. It’s a parents responsibility to provide for their minor children. Keep the money. Maybe CONRIBUTE towards her wedding with a cash gift and provide a down payment on a house but she will never learn how to manage her money if he keeps giving her massive hand outs. Seriously. This incident happened about 4 years ago when I turned 16. She will have to ask permission to buy anything over $50 and have to go by my judgment. Parents should never have to ask their young children for money, or even at all. AITA for "embarrassing" a bride at her wedding? Not the A-hole. " "You're a bitch," deserves either a silent glare of disbelief or "That may be true; but I'm a bitch without the money to lend you. We’re very close because he took care of me when I was little because of my parent’s crazy work schedules. But it was blatantly obvious who they cared about more. AITA for refusing to allow my BIL or his kids into my house? Not the A-hole. 4. Your basically asking for a stay at home nanny’s erntire salary as play money. That's only if she still absolutely needs to continue having her mother watch her child. Memes allowed, shitposts only on weekends. It's your daughter's money, and taking it/pressuring her to give her step-sister money will be immoral. everything they’d need to open lines of credit or loans in your name. The money can barely be called inheritance because my mom and her family didn't have much but it's better than nothing. His first wife died 5 years ago I believe. Because of that we've always dreamed of being grandparents, so we made long-term investments that paid off, and now we have almost $350K saved up to AITA for charging my friends rent then keeping the money for myself? Not the A-hole. That isn't wealthy -- OP did well, but it isn't quite enough to start supporting other family. When I got accepted, the 1st person I told was my uncle. Inheritance isn't marital property. she was only parent and losing her is beyond devastating. His POV is I treated him like a predator and hid money from him for years even when he was at his lowest. My parents are terrible with money. She has asked me before why I don't babysit to help make more money for her brother. We’ve been together 2 years. Important-Writing889. I told him ahead of time that the trip was now off but I didn't tell him I was going to spend the money. The cost to replace my laptop was only $600, Yay Black Friday. This is money I need to live off of for the next 12 years till I retire. However, their actions in recent years has broken my heart. It will be a civil matter. You will need a certain amount of money to move out - money for a deposit on an apartment or utilities. I come from an upper-class family and my fiancée is lower-middle-class (this is a delicate matter for his Family). I've been called a gold-digger, a low-life and a few more vague insults on my table-manners. The husband says OP acted like they stole the money… that is absolutely what happened. Rewarding the sibling who earns more money with more money and punishing the sibling who earns less money with less money. I have two adult brothers who are able to work, but don't. Mom asked how I could put my sister's future at risk. How this whole thing started: About 6 years ago my twin brother (age 30 at the time) was in a bad way financially. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. AITAH For not giving my husband my "escape money" when I saw that we were financially struggling. 38F and 35M share a dad. She will be placed on a strict allowance and budget. This time I won 50,000. I am currently pregnant with our daughter. The trustee can empty or close the account I think, but nobody else can touch the money until the kids are 18. Usually just scratch tickets. Yeah at 3-4 million you can comfortably take roughly 75-100k a year or so (4% rule probably a bit too aggressive and 2-3 best). This goes a lot deeper so I've tried to summarise. (I’m one of 7 siblings, 5 of us were still living at home) I have been hiding that money because I know I would be told to give it up. It’s appalling that they said that they feed you so you should give them your money. I couldn’t ask for anything over $20, while my sister could THIS SUBREDDIT IS FOR A PODCAST CALLED Reddit On Wiki, THAT READS REDDIT STORIES. People cross-post stories for a chance that our podcast hosts (Sean, John and Josh) will read the story on the show. Betty is a hs kid dating a college boy who likely feels that this makes her special and grown up. This can be a life changing amount of money for you if you treat it right. For context, I recently moved back into my family home, which houses two of my siblings, my separated parents, and maternal grandparents. New comments cannot be posted. I went to a 'party' with her the other day, one of those fancy shmancy things where everyone drinks cHaMpAgNe I agree that we aren’t hearing a complete story. However, the family IS their kind of people whenever the family is giving them money and paying their rent and driving 3hrs to deliver a new car OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1 not choosing another wedding dress after my best friend asked. I (f20) have always lived with my parents, I live in the UK and I was always given every opportunity in my life, my parents always drilled into us that we should save. After I told him all this he just broke down sobbing. It's your money, you can spend it however you want. Edit. Asshole. They didn't even ask him to share the money just not accept it because they have chosen to not accept their family. you made the right decision. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1: I take a percentage out of my son's paychecks for his college fund. And I spent it after his stepdaughter found out. So me and my husband have been tother for 8 years, married for 7. Now I love my wife and she loves me (obviously) but her family hatess me. My (56F) daughter (29F) still lives at home. Instead of suggesting they spend the money on buying a house or rental property or put away for retirement he wants her to blow the money away ever since she got it. You paid for their education, just like you're paying for your daughter's. Money is returned by Monday morning or you call the police at 8 a. Thanks for the awards! "Oh no, my child didn't get something minor that I could've gotten myself, I also decided to stop working because i inherited daddy's money that I won't share with my daughter or wife and make my wife work extra to get our daughter anything that causes her joy and encourages her to do better, I will also break the thing that my, mentally drained, daughter, who's doing well at school, enjoys to Well, sucks for you, go make more money! It's not that cut and dry, of course and OP's parents did still gift some money. His family seemed to have pushed the issue and Wrong-Construction40. It's a good position to be in, and maybe better than most. 27F and 24F share a dad. I (28f) am currently taking care of my niece Tina (9f) while my brother is out of town for work for a month. We ended up getting about $1600, so I only ended up paying less than $1000 for the shower. 187K subscribers in the redditonwiki community. I told her to spend money on a tutor for her favorite daughter because I won't do a thing to help either of them with this. I grew up poor. I told her I would meet in a coffee shop, with my wife, and I also recorded the conversation just in case. " MOD. Help keep the sub engaging! If you do lend them the money, make it conditional. he borrowed my money and promises to pay it back tomorrow, he didnt, its almost a month now but few days ago he called me and showed me that he had 20$, i said "cool thanks" as a reached my hand out to get the money then he hides it, he only borrowed 1$. NTA OP - Don't start handing out money or putting yourself in debt. So firstly: as everyone said, your wife/SD are not entitled to money your ex-wife saved for your shared daughter. 2 reconsider and take into account her difficulty finding an ideal dress and that she finally found the ideal that the stylist can make for her body and that I was acting selfishly and should be MIL forgot marriages don't require weddings. so i then decided i was gonna pickpocket him. The problem with the police angle is you gave your father your password and info. Period, end of conversation. He has a daughter Ashley 14 from a previous relationship. Instead, he could acknowledge her through legacies that are more sentimental. my fiance at first said I deserved it and have the right to do whatever I wanted with it. AITA for getting angry at my parents after they refused to look after my children? Asshole. And her mother absolutely needs a key to do so. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place to finally find out if you were wrong in an argument that's been bothering you. This is something she needs to work on for herself as well as her relationship (hopefully this one but a future one if fiancé can’t get past this). Particularly when he's been NC for 16 years. Before the podcast started reading reddit stories, the hosts would choose a topic and research it using Wikipedia. She would work if she could but she's only 11. It wasn't new, but was much newer than my car. That’s absurd unless your very wealthy. Months passed and i was not able to pay them UPDATE 1- March 15, 2022: A lot of people have asked for updates so here it is. Raising two children at a young age has been really difficult, however, I was able to graduate from college with a good degree and start a career that I am happy with. They have to pay you back in xx time frame, and they have to find a place that's actually within their means. YTA. Me (28F) and my fiancé (27M) are getting married in March. You are going to need some sort of proof that she took the money; voicemails, texts, etc. I told her they don't deserve my help. Her husband (35m) was a widower with kids (11m) and (10f). If they can't regularly afford their place, they outright can't afford it. So I (21F) went to my grandads (80M) house last week and he handed me a jar full of cash with my name on it. I (24F) don't even have THAT much. It was very fair, and if they have fixed their appalling bigotry issues, they would be falling all over themselves begging you to take the money. That said - read the feedback and recommendations here and do whatever you can to hide money from your mother - whether through a separate account she cannot get to, or through a cash app on your phone. . I (58M) and my wife (59F) have only one daughter (30F). I WFH so I temporarily moved to my brother's house to look after her. OP's sister is clearly the favorite and they obviously want more rom OP - probably money too and I agree 100% OP needs to stay away and go NC with all of them for good. I spent money I had saved for my dad and I to take a trip on other stuff after he included his stepdaughter in the plans. Struggled to find a job, his credit was shit, his car got repoed, and he was far behind on rent. I asked about it and they said my husband should provide. OP isn’t prioritizing money the way her family is BUT she doesn’t appear to be prioritizing unlearning the toxic beliefs they taught her the way she needs to either. When we were dating his mom used to randomly call him up and ask for money, anywhere from 2-6 thousand dollars. We always wished we could have had more kids, but due to medical complications that I won't go into, we only had our girl. which it failed but im not gonna stop trying I f32 have recently inherited money from my mom. Both of them have pretty bad paying jobs so we don't really ask them for anything when it comes to I broke down and revealed my money to him, which not sits at about $47,000. TATiredofmyMIL. That said: I have a 24yo progressive cousin who uses they/them pronouns who would likely say my evangelical family is not “their kind of people”. Truly. $3. So I met with the wife and wow it was interesting. If they feel that you owe them money, they may try to just take it by getting a loan in your name. For context, I make close to 350k after taxes. It’s not your eventual money paying for it, it’s your MOM’S money and she’s using it to bail your childish ass out so you don’t have to face consequences for your actions. •. Don't pay any attention to your family. in Texas, $30 gets you 10 double cheeseburgers and 10 small fries. Your parents probably know your SSN, date of birth, previous addresses, model of first car, name of best friend from 2nd grade, etc. Clear_Sheepherder_63. You can get any size soda or iced tea/coffee for $1, and two McChickens or McDoubles for $3, which is just $1. NTA accepting an inheritance from someone who was bigoted towards you is not remotely supporting their views, call it the reward for enduring her bullshit. It’s not your job to feed your parents or yourself. As a result my dad and his wife think I'm TA. NTA…plain and simple, if you “loan” you mom €100 then you wouldn’t be able to get to school or your new job. Good for her keeping it separate talk to a financial advisor and maybe a divorce or probate attorney so that the inheritance is properly kept as a separate asset and not commingled Not the A-hole. It started about 2/3 years ago when I was just 18, eager to study abroad. Clearly you want children, but if you have children with this person, your life is only going to get worse. My (33f) and my husband Matteo (31m) have been married for 4 months, together for 3 years. 4 million by the time you're 65 if you don't touch it before then. I moved back to save on money since I am working full time and doing a tech bootcamp to switch careers, but in the That's not just money and we're only hearing the grandparents side. Couldn’t figure how to post as an update so just posting as an edit here. But at 23 y/o, it's time to stop torturing yourself and stop speaking about the money you take in with your parents. They are legally and morally required to provide food, clothing and shelter for their children. AITA for taking money from the dress budget we had to pay for the iPad my fiancé's kid broke? My fiancé and I are getting married in three months, we both have a kid from a previous relationship, my daughter Spencer (15F) and her daughter Emma (8F), the kids get along just fine, not really close because of their ages, but they're friendly and AITA for not giving my son money from my daughters savings? Not the A-hole. ”. AITA: I told my FIL that his wife, my MIL, keeps asking us for money. I spent some of the money from my grandparents over the I agreed to write her a check of $12,000, I really wanted to help her and the money came with no strings attached. Mom called me names and slammed a door when she left me. My wife passed away when my sons were 8 and 4 respectively. However, if your husband considers this his money then he should look towards his financial Only 2 have even bothered to see how I've been. Never, ever poison children by allowing bigots in their You need at least one adult on the account to make legal/financial transactions. Taking the posts seriously is heavily discouraged. I don't know why they (mostly my boyfriend's friends, mix of family) feel entitled to it. They'll drain you dry. My only advice would be - get better and more creative at hiding your money. 50 per sandwich. Their excuse is likely "But it's a baby! NTA. So I took $350 from my account and I took $250 from the money I was going to deposit into her personal account for December and I got my new computer. AITA. AITA for not helping my family when they have financial problems. I (34M) am not fond of my brother’s wife (23F). Award. People cross-post…. Are you supposed to hand them money for not getting another degree? They're responsible for their children, just like you were for yours. r/AmItheAsshole. Your step-daughter have two living parents. So I took all the cash we were given in cards and deposited into my account. She was very appreciative of it. Go to AmItheAsshole. ADMIN MOD. I worked a part time job to get my first car, but my brother got one as a present. She's getting another degree, they aren't. BIL and his kids were nowhere near ready for him to remarry. The treatment could possibly improve my brother's quality of life and or save his live altogether, and I can fund it, but I don't want to. I shrugged. I have been supporting my family and my brothers for the past year and a half. m. Your husband absolutely stole it from you. AITA for screwing over all the people who donated their time and money? Not the A-hole. Since they clearly have not fixed their bigotry, you don't want them around your child. 5 k a month for 12 months is over 40k. But the reasoning just felt like the attitude of the above to me. Lesson learned do not share all information with your Mom. Give dad a deadline. Growing up it was no secret my older sister was the favorite child. This will be my first year in college. And how everyone is OK with him stealing a substantial sum of money from his little sister. I (25F) have two children, my son (4) and my daughter (2). It's certainly not enough to afford a home where I live. Since then I remarried and my new wife and I have been married AITA My parents need money and my brother wont help. THIS SUBREDDIT IS FOR A PODCAST CALLED Reddit On Wiki, THAT READS REDDIT STORIES. Regardless, $75+gas to the court house would eliminate 90% of the AITA posts we get here, so I guess that's a pretty common misconception. EDIT: ***** sickofraciststepdad *****, is pretending to be my stepdaughter & is NOT my actual stepdaughter. I carry it everywhere because Emma is the type to snoop and then tell her dad. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have I think your #1 reason (he wants more money) is probably why. I will take over her finances including receiving her income. When I graduated they did not do the same for me. If he doesn't like it let him leave because it doesn't sound like he's contributing anything. Despite me being able to pay all the costs of the wedding, my AITA for no longer speaking to my family members, despite living in the same home? TL;DR. Help keep the sub engaging! NTA. My oldest daughter is a lawyer, married to an attorney. He was the adult. The tension is high because of this and my sister is loving As far as I can see, your answer to them was perfect. I think more than anything that’s too much to ask for. She’s very demanding of my little brother. With the prices of houses right now and how dangerous the world has become, me and my husband decided Why TF isn't he just divorcing her. Once she pays me back the money, she can take control of her own OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I might've bad mouthed the company accidentally and threatened legal actions unnecessarily (2) as far as I know I didn't hurt the companys name, but in their opinion I definitely could've. When I turned 18, my dad lost his job and needed government support, but feared they’d see my bank balance. I was by no means unloved. And while it's definitely somewhat time sensitive telling them about the college fund in the first meeting in years comes across that it is with stings attached. My daughter was nervous about living on her own and after college she asked if she can come back home until she is ready. She should get min wage tbh and that’s still a lot. BG: Younger sister (28f) married two years ago. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! ADMIN MOD. Keep the money, drop your gran a note to make her happy, you NTA for not sharing your money. Like from the depths of their souls, hates me. Help keep the sub engaging! UPDATE) AITA for telling my parents they don’t have a daughter : r/AmItheAsshole. I have a sister who used to treat apart my room looking for money to steal. AITA for exposing my parents' favoritism. If someone asks why, you don't have to explain. I wrote the check and gave it to her last week. Actually, many McDonald's now have what they call $1 $2 $3 Menu - we have it in the ones nearest me. But you need to be straight up with him and tell him he isn't going to have access to it. I like to play the lottery sometimes. 3. I decided to loan her the money to pay off the debt on strict conditions. The old uniforms are very outdated, and all the kids are excited about getting new ones, including mine. AITA for not wanting to give up my college fund to pay for my younger brother's treatment. My sister also got better gifts then me. The kindest thing he could do now is to stop fully financing her life and to begin working with her, teaching her how to manage money properly. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. 1) regardless of his sexuality, he cheated on your mother and destroyed your family, 2) he taught you to be homophobic, 3) you were 15 when you “hurt him first. Change the code on the safe and don’t tell anyone. AITA returning the money to my MIL in front of everyone embarrassing her? Not the A-hole. Now I know how this sounds but hear me out. But now it seems they have found out I have this money and am being asked to assist them because they are not in a financially stable setting. They hate each other and she's a bitch to his daughter. You're gonna have to have enough spine to put your foot down. There are 5 siblings ages 44M, 38F, 35M, 27F and 24F. 4) any parent who would abandon a child because of words is the worst kind of human being and deserves to die with deep regret. AITA for not making my niece returns the figures she won in a poker game. My mum got remarried last august to her ex husband, the father of 38F and 35M. 3) You would actually be hurting your cousin by giving her money. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I have been badgering my aunt’s husband to pay (2) I have been badgering my aunt’s husband to pay, he clearly doesn’t have my 2) Your life path deeply honors your grandfather's values and how he chose to distribute his money. That person is usually a trustee. Especially financial windfall news. AITA for refusing to spend my money on my stepdaughter's wedding? Not the A-hole. So obviously NTA. Early in the planning I agreed that my property could be AITA for blaming my parents for my money problems. AITA for "stealing" my money from my parents? Not the A-hole. But I said no. AITA for embarrassing my brother about money I gave him in the past? Not the A-hole. AITA for not sharing my wealth with others? Not the A-hole. For a year now I have been asking, begging, even crying for my parents to ask money from them so I dont have to carry with all the burden. 2 million if you want to retire before you're 60. 44M has a different dad. We could both do something bad and only I would get in trouble, they would often say I forced her to do it. If your husband looks at what he inherited as family money, then Tina has already received her share and it would not make sense for her to get a double dip out of that pool. OP: This was your money, your inheritance. Your aunt is disrespecting your grandfather's legacy by asking you to give up your inheritance and career. My parents gave each of my brothers $50,000 when they graduated from university as a downpayment on their home. My wife is upset about this because she feels as if the money should be used for more baby things and not to "pay myself back", as she put it. He told me that she had been doing it for years but he didn’t care AITA for taking money from my friends. No. My dad had saved about 20k for me (my parents divorced when I was three). Something like that. " "I thought we were friends," gets: "we are; but I don't have the money to lend. if you live $10,000 below your means then yes absolutely you can invest and get to a very comfortable All names have been changed. I'll try to keep this as short as I can, but a little background first. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote In an S&P 500 index fund, it should double every 7-10 years, so you're potentially looking at $6. vs vh fh bj sw xb sz gi cv ff